Hey Friend!
Most Architects I know are hesitant to ask for help (especially when they need it most).
Today, I wanted to try something new to help those reluctant Architects become more resilient—a Q&A session.
Each month, I’ll answer the questions about being a Resilient Architect that you want most. Since this is the first of the series, I’ve curated 4 questions I’ve been asked in the past from Architects of all different experience levels. Emerging Professionals, Mid-Career, and Firm Leaders.
If you’d like to participate, please fill out the Google Form by clicking the button below. I’ll pick a few questions (3 to 5 each month) and write about them here for the benefit of everyone who reads The Resilient Architect. Chances are if you’re thinking about something, so is someone else out there. So don’t be shy!
This Month’s Questions:
- What are the early warning signs of burnout that Architects often miss?
- What should I do when I feel like I learned nothing useful in Architecture school?
- How do I maintain my design skills when I’m mostly managing others?
- How do I handle difficult conversations with underperforming team members?
Q1: What are the early warning signs of burnout that Architects often miss?
When Architects start to burn out, there are a few things I tend to see happen first.
The warning signs aren’t what you think they are. Most Architects watch for the obvious stuff—working late, feeling tired, dreading Monday morning. But burnout starts much earlier, in subtle shifts you barely notice.
The real early warnings are loss of curiosity about design, finding yourself saying “that’s good enough” more often, and feeling disconnected from why you became an Architect in the first place. When you stop sketching ideas in your free time, when you avoid architecture blogs you used to love, when you find yourself envying people in other professions—that’s your canary in the coal mine.
Burnout can also mean:
- Increased agitation
- Loss of interest in learning
- Feeling consistently defeated or misdirected
Depending on where you are in your life (and your personality type), you may experience one or all of these symptoms. Whether or not you’ve reached full-on burnout, these symptoms reveal that you may need help navigating your current situation in your Archi-life.
Pay attention to these signals before you hit the wall, because once you’re there, the recovery takes months, not weeks.
Q2: What should I do when I feel like I learned nothing useful in school?
First, stop beating yourself up—this feeling is almost universal among Architects, and it doesn’t mean you’re behind or inadequate.
Architecture school teaches you how to think, not how to practice, and that distinction trips up almost everyone.
You may feel as though you learned nothing useful, but you’ve likely learned how to approach nearly any design problem presented to you with both a creative and technical eye. I personally don’t know everything there is to know about the profession a decade and a half out of school—not even close. There’s no reason to think you should know everything with less time than that.
Instead, continue to ask questions about the things that interest you most. Learn about everything as you go in a general way so that you can have constructive conversations with other professionals—Architects, Engineers, Code Officials, etc.—and dive into the things that excite you. As you uncover something interesting, delve deeper and become the person others turn to for that kind of knowledge.
The gap between school and practice is real, but it’s also your opportunity.
- Start treating every project as your real education.
- Ask questions without shame, find a mentor who remembers what it was like to be new, and build skills deliberately rather than hoping they’ll magically appear.
School gave you the foundation; now you get to build the house. The Architects who thrive are the ones who embrace being beginners and turn their curiosity into their greatest asset.
Architecture is a long profession. You aren’t expected to be an expert at everything right out of the gate.
Q3: How do I maintain my design skills when I’m mostly managing others?
This is the classic Architect’s dilemma—you get promoted for your design skills, then lose them because you’re managing instead of designing.
The key is being intentional about staying connected to the creative process, even if your role has changed.
I’ve been managing projects and teams for nearly my entire career. My bosses have consistently recognized my abilities that lean towards leadership and management, so I was placed in those positions as I proved myself from one project to the next.
That said, Project Management can easily become a double-edged sword. You get so reliable at PM that it can become everything you do.
Something I’ve learned from a mentor of mine, by watching them work, is that once you reach the point where you’re managing others, you also gain equal autonomy in ways that you may not have considered. You gain control of your time and how YOU manage it.
- Block time weekly for design thinking, even if it’s just reviewing and sketching over your team’s work.
- Attend design reviews not as a manager but as a designer.
- Take on small, personal design challenges—sketch a detail, redesign your office layout, critique buildings on your commute.
- Most importantly, resist the urge to completely delegate creative decisions. Be fair in sharing the wealth with the team so they can continue to learn. But keep some design tasks for yourself.
Your design judgment is what got you here; don’t let it atrophy because you think management means stepping away from design entirely.
Q4: How do I handle difficult conversations with underperforming team members?
The biggest mistake Architects make with difficult conversations is waiting too long to have them.
We’re conflict-averse by nature, but avoiding these conversations only makes them harder and less effective when they finally happen.
Being a leader can be a tough job. Sometimes it means stepping in to work with someone on your direct team or with a consultant who is not performing their duties and responsibilities at the level you expect.
For me, it starts with two things:
- Having empathy and asking if something is going on in their lives first.
- Being direct about what is NOT working for you and the project(s) they are working on.
I once had someone I worked with (let’s call him Jake) who repeatedly kept missing deadlines, made mistakes, and started to pull everyone else’s work down around him because of it. I sat down with him to talk about his performance. But the first question I asked had nothing to do with work. I asked, “How are you doing?” Followed up by, “Is anything going on at home?”
It turned out that Jake did have stress at home. Before I could even describe the performance issues, he acknowledged nearly every one on his own saying, “I know I could do better. I just get so in my head and then don’t ask questions. Then I have stuff going on with the house, and I spiral a bit some days. I’m sorry.”
Start with curiosity, not judgment.
- Ask questions like “What’s making this project challenging for you?” or “What support do you need to deliver your best work?”
- Frame the conversation around outcomes, not personality.
- Be specific about what needs to change and by when, but also listen for underlying issues—maybe they’re overwhelmed, undertrained, or dealing with personal challenges.
The goal isn’t to be right; it’s to help them succeed or, if that’s not possible, to part ways respectfully. Remember, having these conversations early and honestly is actually the kindest thing you can do for everyone involved.